it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
