just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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