well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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