Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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