I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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