ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
