Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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