Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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