I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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