And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize