I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Welp...herpes.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
