i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
