Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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