Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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