no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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