Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
