How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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