you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
So gin and wine won't be happening again
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
