Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
try to milk me bitch
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