yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
