I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
