Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(281): View more from Texas

# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279

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(954): View more from Florida

I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?

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(502): View more from Kentucky

It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament

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(615): View more from Tennessee

The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.

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(562): View more from California

I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.

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(260): View more from Indiana

If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.

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(806): View more from Texas

The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.

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(636): View more from Missouri

My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.

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