I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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