doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
