Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I need water and some morals
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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