Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
The beer is more important than you right now.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Drunk walkin through police station. America
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Randomize
