I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize