I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
