I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
