i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
im about as happy as oj after his trial
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
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