Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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