dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
