She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
