i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize