is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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