oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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