Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
