smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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