What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize