Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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