found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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