Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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