i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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