we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
