I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
