What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize