Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
