Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
