it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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