What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
