i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
